Pleasant Afternoon @ the Doctor's Office

A few months ago, I noticed that the middle finger on my left hand was really crooked. The top knuckle was all swollen and the bone felt really tender on the side. Something was definitely amiss.....but for the life of me, I couldn't remember hurting it. Didn't slam it in anything, didn't knock it against anything, didn't fall and jam it. It really only hurts if something is touching the bone. I can bend it fine. Anyway, it just looked freaky, so I pointed it out to my primary care doctor when I had my annual physical at the beginning of June. She said, "yup....looks like it's crooked. Maybe you dislocated it. I'll give you a referral to a orthopedic hand surgeon."

So, the next day, I called the hand surgeon and made an appointment. The first appointment they could give me was for July 30. Nearly 2 months later. Whoa! Who knew there were so many injured hands in the greater Boston area! Too much masturbating, I guess.

So, here we are. A few days before my appointment the ordeal begins.....This past Friday morning, sometime after 10am, a receptionist from the hand surgeon left me a message on my home answering machine telling me that they wouldn't be able to x-ray my hand @ my appointment on Monday. I needed to either go to Beth Israel Deaconess Hospital in Needham Friday, or before my appointment on Monday, or I could come to their office by 2pm that day for the x-ray. (I got the message around 1pm). Either way, I was supposed to call the office and let them know my plans.

The work hours at my job, fortunately, are pretty flexible right now. But what do people do that have regular 9-5 jobs? How the hell are they supposed to drop everything and go to get the x-ray on such short notice? And the appointment is a waste if you don't have the x-ray.

So, around 2pm, I called the doctor's office as instructed. I told them I couldn't make it to their office but that I would go to Beth Israel before my appointment on Monday. I asked where I was supposed to go in the hospital and if I needed any paperwork from the doctor. The receptionist said she would fax over something from the doctor and that it would be there when I went on Monday for the x-ray. Perfect! All ducks are in a row.....

Got up this morning and went over to the hospital. Stopped @ registration where they go over all your info. Almost everything was wrong.....emergency contacts, addresses, phone numbers. After getting all that info corrected, I walked down to radiology. I handed my paperwork to the woman at the desk, and she asked if I had the order from my doctor. I told her they faxed it over on Friday. She looked around for it and kind of surly, responded, "Well I don't have it. Let me call in the back office and see if it's there." Well, it wasn't there either. She gave me a scowl and said "I guess I have to call the doctor's office and have them send it." I'm starting to get in a bad mood at this point. No clue why this woman is so irritated with me....I'm being very polite and pleasant. It's not my fault the doc's office dropped the ball.

I go sit down. A few minutes later, she says that they are faxing it over, but that they told her that I never returned their call on Friday. Ummmm...I had an f-ing 10 minute conversation with someone in the doctor's office! I apologized to the hospital lady (not sure why) and told her that I HAD spoken with someone. She softened up a little bit and said that there was probably just a mixup.

I get called back for my x-rays. The x-ray tech was one of those sugary sweet, but super phony people. Overly nice. It kinda made me want to vomit. And she had this annoying habit of talking to me like I was 10 years old, and saying my name to begin or end every sentence.

Fast forward a few hours later. I arrive @ my doctor's office @ 3:15pm....15 minutes before my scheduled appointment. Fill out all the paperwork and hand it to the receptionist. On my way to sit down I rummage through the shittiest selection of magazines. I finally find a Vogue (which I don't even like....too hoity toity, but it was the best option) and page through it. The waiting room is packed with people. And there is a lot of time in between people getting called back. This should have tipped me off.

So, I sit there shivering (it was FREEZING in the waiting room), using my big purse as a blanket (the one day I don't bring a book and my jacket......figures!) for what seems like forever. This older gentleman walks up to the window and tells the ladies @ the desk that the wait is unconscionable and inexcusable, and then he walks out. Old people don't put up with shit!

Another guy and I exchange pleasantries a few minutes later. He shakes his head and complains about the wait. He says that he's just not going to show up for doctor's appointments on time anymore....what's the point? THEY are never on time. I glance @ my cell phone. My appointment was @ 3:30. It's now 4:30. What!? I love that the receptionists don't even mention that the doctor is running behind.

Around 4:45, a woman comes in.....probably my age. She is very chatty. At first I was annoyed, but then I was grateful for the conversation....it helped pass the time. She told me about a new dog park in Foxboro, that I'm going to check out, so that was good. She asked who I was seeing.....turns out she was seeing the same doctor. When I told her how long I'd been waiting, she laughed, rolled her eyes, and said this wasn't too unusual. She said he's a great doctor, but that he likes to talk. GREAT! By now, it's almost 5pm. I walked up to the window and asked when I would be taken back....that I'd been waiting for an hour and a half. She said I was next. But, no apology.....no explanation. CUSTOMER SERVICE, PEOPLE!!!!!!!!! It's just inconsiderate and bad business. I find that doctor's offices often have some of the most unfriendly people working in them.....not usually the doctors themselves....but the people in the reception area, billing department, and the nursing staff. It's unfortunate.

Once I got back to an actual room (again, no "sorry for the wait"), I waited another 10 minutes. The doc came in, joked around that he's never going on vacation again since it was so crazy today, and sat down to find out what was going on with my hand. He was actually very nice, looked @ my x-rays, explained what he thought was going on (which, by the way, was arthritis.....fantastic......35 years old and I have the start of arthritis in my hand). Nothing to worry about, nothing to do, unless it starts to hurt....he can give me a brace or we can try cortisone shots.

So, to sum up......2 months of waiting for an appointment + 2 hours waiting in the doctors office= ten minutes with the doc telling me I have arthritis and that my finger is just going to be crooked.

Finally, I get out of there around 5:45. Take the elevator to the parking garage underneath the building. Step out of the door in the elevator waiting area, and the entire garage floor is flooded.....like5-6 inches of water. What?! Past my ankles. Feet were soaked.....glad I wore sandals today. It poured when I was in my appointment, but geez......I have no idea where all this water came from. Wacky.

After all this annoyance, went through the Mcdonalds drive through for a small fry to cheer me up!

Ace of Cakes

K got me hooked on the show Ace of Cakes on the Food Network.

These people totally amaze me! I am blown away by how realistic these cakes look. Most of them don't even look like cakes, and the amount of detail is just silly. The people that work at Charm City Cakes in Baltimore, MD are truly artists. I wish I was this talented! CCC looks like such a cool place to work....they look like they have a ton of fun. Plus, I want to marry Duff, the owner. I have a huge crush on him.....The picture is of a cake of Wrigley Field in Chicago. You can check out many of their cakes @ www.charmcitycakes.com

I don't trust people who don't like dogs......

Every night when I get home from work and come in my front door, I'm greeted by my 7 year old golden retriever, Jake. No matter how horrible a day I've had, I am always cheered up when I see his sweet mug. He usually brings me something (his rope or a tennis ball) and then kind of goes in circles, wagging his tail like a wrecking ball, knocking over whatever is on the coffee table. He's also a big leaner and practically knocks me over while he leans into my legs, while I give him snuggles and smootches and talk to him like an idiot. This is pretty much the scenerio each and every day. It never ever gets old.

After we've said our greetings, it's time to throw on the Sauconys, grab a poop bag (not a bag of poop, mind you., but a plastic bag to pick up the huge turds he will deposit on the sidewalk), and head out for our nightly walk. Sometimes we just do a quick walk around the block, but lately, since the weather's been really nice, we've been taking longer walks, most nights walking up to downtown West Newton, past the movie theatre and all the shops/restaurants. On our walks, we pass lots of people. People walking home from the commuter train, people on their way to a movie or the Boston Sports Club on the corner to work out, or the liquor store, or CVS, or to pick up takeout at Shing Yee and Blue Ribbon. We pass joggers. We pass parents pushing kids in strollers. We pass people out walking their dogs too....Jakey's favorite is when we see his friend Owen. There are lots of folks out and about in my hood. That's one of the things I love about living here.

But, on more than one occasion, I've observed something. I noticed it again tonight. Whenever I pass someone on the sidewalk, I either smile or say hello. Every time. It's just friendly and neighborly and courteous. Most people will return the greeting. Some people even stop me because my dog is so handsome! But then, there are always a few assholes that either completely ignore me when I smile or speak to them, or will go ahead and make eye contact with me and then give me a grouchy puss. What the F? How hard is it to just smile back at someone. Does it really take that much effort to say a one syllable word? HI! Even if you don't like dogs (which I admit, I don't get, and am very skeptical of a person's character if he/she dislikes mutts), you don't have to be unfriendly and give me dirty looks. I have obviously shortened my dog's leash, have moved him to the opposite side of me, so that he is not in your path, and am carrying a pungent bag of shit so that you will not step in it and soil your shoes. I don't know if it's that you don't like my dog or if you think that I am a bad seed. Whatever it is, it's just uncalled for. Life is too short to be in such a bad mood........

2007 World Series of Pop Culture Long Promo

2007 World Series of Pop Culture

Sometimes summer tv pickings are pretty slim. Other than Big Brother 8 (which I am totally loving, by the way), My Life on the D List (Kathy Griffin's show on Bravo...I looooooove her), and Top Chef, there seems to be a plethora of ridiculously horrid reality shows this year (and if you know me, I am not the most discriminating when it comes reality tv programming.....I will watch almost anything). I just can't bring myself to watch: So You Think You Can Dance, America's Got Talent (uhh...not on this particular show), American Inventor, and Pirate Master. I have to draw the line somewhere.....

But things are looking up. This week, one of my new favorite shows started its second season. It's called The World Series of Pop Culture, and it airs on VH1. I enjoy this show tremendously! I think it's on every night this week at 9pm for the first round of competition (and being that it's VH1, will air about a gazillion more times). Not sure how many weeks it's on.....I wish it was the whole summer because I am OBSESSED with it. It's amazing the amount of trivial pop culture knowledge that is floating around in my brain. I don't mean to brag, but I definitely bring some skills to the table. I am totally addicted to this show!

I also am a fan of the host....Pat Kiernan. He has a really dry wit and is kinda sarcastic. Plus I enjoyed hearing him read, deadpan, the lyrics for songs such as The Thong Song, Baby Got Back, and My Humps in the category entitled Rump Shakers. Fantastic.....

I'm thinking next year, me and some of my pals should try out for the show. It would be fun....plus I could use the $250,000.

Tomatoes '07

Last year was the first year I grew tomatoes. I was somewhat skeptical that I would be successful as I don't have much of a green thumb. Usually, any house plant I've bought, has lasted less than 6 months. But, I thought I would give it a try. I planted 3 varieties of heirloom tomatoes on my back deck.....a green tomato called green zebra stripe, a yellow tomato called golden girl, and a purple tomato called purple cherokee. Pleasantly, to my surprise, my plant growing skills vastly improved! I had tons of yummy tomatoes....too many for me to eat myself actually, so I gave lots away. I had one problem on the purple plant with the bottoms of the tomatoes rotting, but only for part of the summer. This year, I was excited to grow tomatoes again. Two weeks ago, I went to buy my plants at the place I got them last year. When I got there, I couldn't find any and asked an employee to direct me to them. I was told that they were completely sold out!Yikes! I was bummed that I might not be able to grow this year because I had missed my plant buying window. That was it......I was on a QUEST! I ended up going to three more places that Sunday before I found decent looking plants. I was very happy I stumbled upon some. I'm growing green zebra stripe again this year, and then two organically grown heirlooms different from last year.....yellow brandywine and purple calabash. They are already growing like crazy and have some flowers......I've had to stake once and probably should do it again soon. Very exciting!

Can't Touch This!

I discovered this stop sign at one of the post offices near my work. It's the best! Stop....Hammertime!

Hot Dog Eating Contest 2007

Joey Chestnut brings the Yellow Mustard Belt back to the U.S.!

Let me preface this entry by saying I'm a little embarrassed that I find this so entertaining....

The past couple of years on the 4th of July, I've watched the Coney Island Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest. For all of the years I've watched (maybe 6?), the competition has been dominated by this tiny Japanese guy named Kobayashi. He is unstoppable.....or WAS unstoppable, until today.

Last year, another contestant gave him a run for his money. His name is Joey Chestnut. The 2007 showdown was going to be interesting because Kobayashi had a jaw injury due to a recent wisdom tooth extraction, not to mention the fact that Joey was right on his heels in last year's battle. In fact, Kobayashi didn't even arrive on the bus with all the other contestants today .....he arrived later by limo, because he was getting last minute acupuncture treatments for his injury.

Watching this on ESPN is strangely exciting....from the packed crowd, screaming and waving yellow inflatable tubes, to the announcer yelling out the introductions of the eaters as they strut across the stage to take their positions before huge plates of hot dogs and cups of water (for dunking the buns in....a common technique utilized by many of the competitors). Then, once the eating actually commences, it is at the same time disgusting, yet riveting and impressive. The announcers doing the color commentary are very amusing (and quite informative in the arena of competitive eating). I learned that one of the two female eaters, whose nickname is the Black Widow, once ate one tenth of her body weight in cheesecake. Wow! I learned that the "reversal of fortune" (ummm....when the food comes back up during competition) can be grounds for disqualification. I also learned about different eating techniques.....for example, "chipmunking".....which is storing the food in your cheeks, as you cram more down your gullet. FASCINATING!!!!!!!!!!

This year's competition didn't disappoint. I think in the first minute and a half, Joey had managed to inhale 15 hot dogs. Kobayashi started a bit slower but as time progressed, pulled within 2 hot dogs. Then in the final 5 minutes or so, tied with Joey. I don't think Kobayashi ever took over the lead, but it was definitely a photo finish and the commentators predicted that the judges would most likely have to make the final decision. In the last few seconds, Kobayashi unfortunately (and quite grossly, for spectators watching) had a reversal of fortune, yet continuted eating. Hot dogs and vomit.....tasty! Ummmm....YUCK! A few minutes later, the judges rendered their decision......Kobayashi was docked 3 hot dogs for his regurgitation and came in second. And with a new world record, a ridiculous 66 hot dogs in 12 minutes, Joey Chestnut from the United States, was crowned champion!

Good times......

p.s. I love that competitive eating is a "sport" with a federation to regulate the competitions. It's called the International Federation of Competitive Eating. I checked out the website http://www.ifoce.com/. Give it a look.....you can read all about the top 20 competitive eaters, as well as find out about upcoming competitions (just in case you wanted to start training!)

The Friendly Toast.....YUM!

This past weekend, my friend S and I took a day trip to Portland, Maine. I had been there a few months ago for the first time, with my friend M. For my Christmas present last year, he had gotten me tickets to a Portland Pirates minor league hockey game.....a very thoughtful gift. He knew my dad and I used to go see Hershey Bears games when I was growing up. Very sweet. Anyway, we didn't have much time to explore Portland before the game, but what I did see, I dug. I've been wanting to go back to check it all out.

We left around 10:30am for the almost hour and a half drive. We didn't really have a set schedule...we were just going to wander around. On the way to Portland, you drive through Portsmouth, New Hampshire, another very cool little town. Two years ago, on a similar road trip, I had done a little research about Portsmouth online beforehand, and found this really interesting sounding restaurant. It's called the Friendly Toast. First of all, LOVE the name. The descriptions online sounded great. It was a must visit for me. When we arrived, I was not at all disappointed! It's kind of a kitschy comfort food diner type place. Lots of old toys, games, tchotchkes, and advertisements hanging on the walls.....very retro. Many of the servers are inked up and sporting various piercings. There's always fun stuff to look at! And the food knocked my socks off. It's usually a good sign when you go to a restaurant and there is always a line out the door.

Well, needless to say there was discussion of taking a detour through Portsmouth either on the way to Portland or on the way home. If we're this close, it's unacceptable to not stop and pay a visit to the FT. So about halfway there, we both decided we would need to stop on the way for a hearty breakfast. We needed something to fuel us for all the walking we would be doing on the cobblestone streets of Portland. I think this visit, I had my most favorite meal there to date. A breakfast sangwich on thickly sliced homemade bread (buttered of course). On it, eggs over medium and cheddar cheese. This was not a sammy to be picked up and eaten (I tried with my first bite and could tell it would be a messy proposition....better to use a knife and fork!). Simple....but very tasty. However, not as tasty as the famous Friendly Toast home fries. Now, my dad makes some extremely good home fries. Always a request when I'm home visiting my family. He uses all the spices and the old, seasoned cast iron skillet....the whole nine. I never thought anyone could top my dad's special recipe. Don't tell him, but FT's home fries blow his out of the water. They are perfect....with lots of crispy bits, which is the best part. I could eat vats of those tators. I'm sure they are about a gazillion calories but I don't care......If you're ever nearby (or even not nearby), you MUST check this place out.